The organization I am volunteering for, CCASA (Colorado Coalition Against Sexual Assault), addresses gender issues associated with all types of sexual violence. One way they do this is by having their members participate in training sessions about different aspects of sexual assault in a very gender neutral way, because no gender is exempt from sexual violence. They do address specific genders when or where it is specifically needed, such as different needs different genders might require in order to get the proper support. (Male, Female, Transgendered etc.) They do this not only because different genders might respond in a different way to sexual violence but because that violence may have occurred because of their specific gender in the first place.
Another way they address gender issues regarding sexual violence is, through their handbook called, "Toward Healing & Justice: A Handbook for Survivors of Sexual Assault". It has some sections geared toward specific gender's issues with sexual violence, such as for men and LGBTQQI (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning, or Intersex). In the LGBTQQI section it says, "Perpetrators may use sexual violence to "punish" and humiliate someone for their sexual orientation or gender identity." This definitely expresses a need for a separate section for each gender or gender group.
From what I can see so far, CCASA does a great job at addressing the needs of all genders when it comes to advocacy against sexual assault of any kind. They believe that it doesn't matter who you are, what your gender is, or what you look like. Sexual violence is sexual violence, period. They even offer the option to their members(or non members for a small fee) to request more individualized training sessions if they have a specific need to be more informed or better trained to help survivors of sexual assault of a specific gender. If they cannot fulfill the need themselves they will find resources to help in any way they can.
The only suggestions I might have would be to expand further in each gender section within their handbook or have separate pamphlets for each gender with more information, and perhaps having an entire training session geared just towards the different motivations for sexual assault on specific genders and how to support those victims. This should include a section for women, because even though it seems like it is a given that women are the main group of victims, they still may need something geared toward only and specifically them.
I am glad CCASA does a great job at being gender neutral when addressing sexual violence in general, but also focuses on specific genders when needed. CCASA seems to be a great organization that just wants to help all victims of any kind of sexual violence, and I support that one hundred percent!
To learn more about CCASA's mission statement, values, and vision please visit:
http://www.ccasa.org/whoweare/index.cfm
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Of Course I Would Recommend "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch to Children!
As a child, one of my favorite books that my mom would read to us was, "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch. I loved it for many reasons such as, the way it made me feel when my mom would squeeze us tight while reading the, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." lines. As well as, when she would read it a few times in one night because we loved it so much.
It is about how a mother raises her boy with unconditional love, and rocks him while he sleeps singing the "I'll love you forever..." song even when he grows to be an adult and she drives to his house just to do so (not every night, of course!). Eventually, the mom gets old and sick and calls the son to come see her and he rocks her while singing the same "I'll love you forever..." song that she always sang to him. Then he comes home and picks up his baby daughter and does the same to her.
While reading this book we didn't aknowledge that the boy got away with doing bad things while growing up and there was no mention of reprimand. We would just laugh at the silly pictures of the boy as a baby tearing apart the bathroom, him dragging mud into the house, and using a lamp as a microphone, then the mother saying that sometimes she wanted to sell him to the zoo! My mom would always say at that part, "sometimes I want to sell YOU to the zoo!"
We never realized that the mom had to call her son to come see her when she was sick and that was when he rocked her. What we did realize was that he did go rock her, sang the song to her, and then did the same for his daughter. I would, without a doubt, recommend this book for children of all types. I believe all children deserve unconditional love from their parents and they need to see that they can give it back. They also deserve to read books about it! I would also recommend this book for parents so that they might see how to give unconditional love, or perhaps more enough love. I love this book, and I plan on reading it frequently to my children.
To purchase this book or to learn more about the author and more of his books visit:
http://www.amazon.com/Love-You-Forever-Robert-Munsch/dp/0920668372
http://robertmunsch.com/
It is about how a mother raises her boy with unconditional love, and rocks him while he sleeps singing the "I'll love you forever..." song even when he grows to be an adult and she drives to his house just to do so (not every night, of course!). Eventually, the mom gets old and sick and calls the son to come see her and he rocks her while singing the same "I'll love you forever..." song that she always sang to him. Then he comes home and picks up his baby daughter and does the same to her.
While reading this book we didn't aknowledge that the boy got away with doing bad things while growing up and there was no mention of reprimand. We would just laugh at the silly pictures of the boy as a baby tearing apart the bathroom, him dragging mud into the house, and using a lamp as a microphone, then the mother saying that sometimes she wanted to sell him to the zoo! My mom would always say at that part, "sometimes I want to sell YOU to the zoo!"
We never realized that the mom had to call her son to come see her when she was sick and that was when he rocked her. What we did realize was that he did go rock her, sang the song to her, and then did the same for his daughter. I would, without a doubt, recommend this book for children of all types. I believe all children deserve unconditional love from their parents and they need to see that they can give it back. They also deserve to read books about it! I would also recommend this book for parents so that they might see how to give unconditional love, or perhaps more enough love. I love this book, and I plan on reading it frequently to my children.
To purchase this book or to learn more about the author and more of his books visit:
http://www.amazon.com/Love-You-Forever-Robert-Munsch/dp/0920668372
http://robertmunsch.com/
An Amazing Opportunity
I am volunteering with the Colorado Coalition Against Sexual Assault and I could not be more excited! After my first meeting with Alexa Priddy, the Outreach Coordinator, I new that this was the right place for me. It was a warm, welcoming environment but I could tell from my first step into the office that this organization means business. There is a map of Colorado on the wall divided into their five different regions and pins to represent their member's. That showed me, in a nutshell, all of the people that CCASA trains and gives resources to so that they can take that knowledge and new set of resources back to their organization to help victims of sexual assault in their area.
I did not know exactly what to expect when I first decided to volunteer with CCASA, all I knew was that I was going to be doing some very important work that is extremely close to my heart. I did not know that this organization is the big umbrella for many of the smaller, local agencies that assist with sexual assault victims. They give resources to smaller agencies for them to be able to do things like film screenings, fundraisers and political rallies. From the CCASA website, http://www.ccasa.org/membership.cfm/Training, the training sessions they offer include:
I expect to do a lot of good on campus by being able to help this organization. I, along with three other students, will be putting on a film screening on campus in April. I know that this will do some good, not because I can see into the future or that there is some sort of guarantee, but because I know that creating some awareness in the student community can only help. This expectation not only comes from a personal knowledge of the need for this campus awareness, but because I know there is still a lot of confusion on the issue of sexual assault among many people, especially college students.
I also expect to learn a lot while working with CCASA, because even though I have a connection to this issue, I know that it is impossible for me to know every fact already. Not only is there always more to learn, no matter what the subject, but I have already learned that there are so many resources that I had never known about before. Just in the, "Toward Healing & Justice: A Handbook For Survivors Of Sexual Assault" I received from CCASA, one can find the Colorado Sexual Assault Laws, ways to assist a victim in healing (for themselves as well as for friends and family of the survivor) and so much more.
I am already proud to be a volunteer with CCASA and I can't wait to help accomplish great things along side them! I know my expectations will come true, and much more than I can even imagine right now! I am very glad I am being given this opportunity, and am excited to help as many people as I can.
For more information about the Colorado Coalition Against Sexual Assault visit:
http://www.ccasa.org
I did not know exactly what to expect when I first decided to volunteer with CCASA, all I knew was that I was going to be doing some very important work that is extremely close to my heart. I did not know that this organization is the big umbrella for many of the smaller, local agencies that assist with sexual assault victims. They give resources to smaller agencies for them to be able to do things like film screenings, fundraisers and political rallies. From the CCASA website, http://www.ccasa.org/membership.cfm/Training, the training sessions they offer include:
- Sexual Assault 101
- Basic Advocacy for Survivors of Sexual Assault
- Intersections Between Stalking and Sexual Assault
- Prevention of Sexual Violence
- Intimate Partner Sexual Violence
I expect to do a lot of good on campus by being able to help this organization. I, along with three other students, will be putting on a film screening on campus in April. I know that this will do some good, not because I can see into the future or that there is some sort of guarantee, but because I know that creating some awareness in the student community can only help. This expectation not only comes from a personal knowledge of the need for this campus awareness, but because I know there is still a lot of confusion on the issue of sexual assault among many people, especially college students.
I also expect to learn a lot while working with CCASA, because even though I have a connection to this issue, I know that it is impossible for me to know every fact already. Not only is there always more to learn, no matter what the subject, but I have already learned that there are so many resources that I had never known about before. Just in the, "Toward Healing & Justice: A Handbook For Survivors Of Sexual Assault" I received from CCASA, one can find the Colorado Sexual Assault Laws, ways to assist a victim in healing (for themselves as well as for friends and family of the survivor) and so much more.
I am already proud to be a volunteer with CCASA and I can't wait to help accomplish great things along side them! I know my expectations will come true, and much more than I can even imagine right now! I am very glad I am being given this opportunity, and am excited to help as many people as I can.
For more information about the Colorado Coalition Against Sexual Assault visit:
http://www.ccasa.org
My Movement
When asked which movement I identify most with I tried very hard to choose between the Women's Movement, specifically with the Liberal Feminists, and the Profeminist Men's Movement. Then I decided I do not have to choose. I choose both, mainly because they work side by side and they both contain vital points of what I believe in.
The Second Wave of the Women's Movement is when Liberal Feminism first came about. Originally it focused on the white, middle class, housewife that was unhappy having to stay at home with no control over her life. While I agree that women in that sort of position should stand up and fight against it, I identify with the more current Liberal Feminists that include all races and classes in the struggle for equality. The Liberal Feminists fight for full equality between men and women such as, but not limited to: equal pay for equal work, equal opportunities in the work place, federally funded child-care centers, and for it to be illegal to discriminate against sex. The only thing missing is equality for men.
I understand that when I say that last statement many women immediately react with, "What about equality for men? They already have everything!" In some ways that may be true but why is it that when a man cries, or is in any way emotional, he is made fun of or told he isn't really a man? Why is it that men don't have paternity leave? Isn't it important for a newborn child to bond with his father as well as mother? These questions led me to believe that it is completely impossible for me to be a feminist without also thinking about the rights that men are deprived of, even if there are less of them, because wouldn't that mean I was, in turn also being sexist?
I believe that the Profeminist Men's Movement is something that all men should support. It promotes equality among men and women, especially equal pay for equal work and equal treatment in society. These profeminist men stand up for women's right and fight along side Liberal Feminists, politically and even in their day to day lives. They also fight for the right for men to have emotions like every person should. According to Julia Wood, "Most male feminists think that, in constricting men's ability to understand and experience many emotions, society has robbed them of an important aspect of what it means to be human; a major goal of male feminists is to change that." (Gendered Lives) I believe a man cannot be a man without his emotions. With society making the emotional man taboo it is creating an army of men that have many feelings bottled up inside, sometimes all of their lives! How can that be good for society?! It is not good for society and it is not good for men.
Ever since I have begun to identify myself as a feminist I have always known that I also feel there needs to be a change for men as well. I will continue to stand up for equality for both sexes, in day to day life, in my work and my studies. However, now I know there are two movements that are aligned with how I feel, those are Liberal Feminism and the Profeminist Men's Movement.
Below is a link to a Radical Profeminist's Blog that I found rather interesting:
http://radicalprofeminist.blogspot.com/
The Second Wave of the Women's Movement is when Liberal Feminism first came about. Originally it focused on the white, middle class, housewife that was unhappy having to stay at home with no control over her life. While I agree that women in that sort of position should stand up and fight against it, I identify with the more current Liberal Feminists that include all races and classes in the struggle for equality. The Liberal Feminists fight for full equality between men and women such as, but not limited to: equal pay for equal work, equal opportunities in the work place, federally funded child-care centers, and for it to be illegal to discriminate against sex. The only thing missing is equality for men.
I understand that when I say that last statement many women immediately react with, "What about equality for men? They already have everything!" In some ways that may be true but why is it that when a man cries, or is in any way emotional, he is made fun of or told he isn't really a man? Why is it that men don't have paternity leave? Isn't it important for a newborn child to bond with his father as well as mother? These questions led me to believe that it is completely impossible for me to be a feminist without also thinking about the rights that men are deprived of, even if there are less of them, because wouldn't that mean I was, in turn also being sexist?
I believe that the Profeminist Men's Movement is something that all men should support. It promotes equality among men and women, especially equal pay for equal work and equal treatment in society. These profeminist men stand up for women's right and fight along side Liberal Feminists, politically and even in their day to day lives. They also fight for the right for men to have emotions like every person should. According to Julia Wood, "Most male feminists think that, in constricting men's ability to understand and experience many emotions, society has robbed them of an important aspect of what it means to be human; a major goal of male feminists is to change that." (Gendered Lives) I believe a man cannot be a man without his emotions. With society making the emotional man taboo it is creating an army of men that have many feelings bottled up inside, sometimes all of their lives! How can that be good for society?! It is not good for society and it is not good for men.
Ever since I have begun to identify myself as a feminist I have always known that I also feel there needs to be a change for men as well. I will continue to stand up for equality for both sexes, in day to day life, in my work and my studies. However, now I know there are two movements that are aligned with how I feel, those are Liberal Feminism and the Profeminist Men's Movement.
Below is a link to a Radical Profeminist's Blog that I found rather interesting:
http://radicalprofeminist.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
The Effects of a Name
While reading the section in Gendered Lives called "Language Shapes Awareness of Gendered Issues" I couldn't help but think about something very personal to me. More than one person I know has been raped, and they both called it "being taken advantage of." In both cases they had to have been drugged or their drink was spiked with more alcohol than they had knowledge of, because both of them woke up not knowing what had happened The last thing they remembered was when they had gone out the night before and having only one or two drinks.
The truth is, this IS being taken advantage of but it is much more than that. It is a black and white case of rape. However, for a victim of rape just saying that word can make them quiver and have an anxiety attack. It may make them closer to recovery, but it makes them also face the fact that they were raped and there was nothing they could do about it anymore.
The woman I know that was raped didn't realize what had happened at first, it took her a few days to put the few pieces of what she started to remember together and when she went to the hospital it was too late for a rape kit. When she spoke with a detective he said he was willing to investigate the case and do what he could, but asked if she thought her case would stand up facing a jury made of both men and women of all ages. Knowing that alcohol and/or some sort of date rape drug was involved, she had little memory of what had happened, and had waited too long to get a rape kit done she knew that it would have been a waste of her time, money, and extreme mental distress to pursue the case. She new that in the end, it would have been her word against his. So for a while she just said she was "taken advantage of," dropped out of school and tried to make a new kind of life, but eventually there was no way to get around it. She had to go to counseling, become diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and come face to face with the word, "rape".
Names are powerful. Names can hurt, even when they are needed for good. The word "rape" has to exist to make people aware of the seriousness of what happens to victims, but sometimes that word is also extremely hard to face.
The truth is, this IS being taken advantage of but it is much more than that. It is a black and white case of rape. However, for a victim of rape just saying that word can make them quiver and have an anxiety attack. It may make them closer to recovery, but it makes them also face the fact that they were raped and there was nothing they could do about it anymore.
The woman I know that was raped didn't realize what had happened at first, it took her a few days to put the few pieces of what she started to remember together and when she went to the hospital it was too late for a rape kit. When she spoke with a detective he said he was willing to investigate the case and do what he could, but asked if she thought her case would stand up facing a jury made of both men and women of all ages. Knowing that alcohol and/or some sort of date rape drug was involved, she had little memory of what had happened, and had waited too long to get a rape kit done she knew that it would have been a waste of her time, money, and extreme mental distress to pursue the case. She new that in the end, it would have been her word against his. So for a while she just said she was "taken advantage of," dropped out of school and tried to make a new kind of life, but eventually there was no way to get around it. She had to go to counseling, become diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and come face to face with the word, "rape".
Names are powerful. Names can hurt, even when they are needed for good. The word "rape" has to exist to make people aware of the seriousness of what happens to victims, but sometimes that word is also extremely hard to face.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
You Expect That Of My Gender?
Sometimes it seems like if I don't follow what is expected of my gender, I miss out on things that other women find essential to the meaning of being a woman. For instance, I went out with a new friend and her roommate a couple of weeks ago and somehow we got on the subject of men buying drinks for women. I shared that I have never been bought a drink before and my husband claims it is because I don't give off a vibe that says, "If you buy me a drink, you might have a chance with me". (He said this before we were even engaged so I can't blame it on my rings and say the men just know I am not available). He says my strong and independent personality "oozes" out of me and that makes it hard to approach me because it seems like they will instantly strike out. This may be true, but I know many strong, independent women that get bought drinks all the time. So, back to square one.
When I tell people that I have never been bought a drink by a guy I get generally the same reaction. Usually some laughs (which makes me feel more pathetic) and then, "Are you serious? Why?". They tell me they don't believe it, that I have the looks and the personality so it doesn't make sense. I have had many friends tell me that they rarely buy drinks for themselves, they just flirt with guys and the drinks start flowing.
Is this really what is expected of my gender? Do I need strange men buying me drinks to be considered a real, sensual, desirable woman? I don't think so, I think it makes me more of a woman that I am not pretending to be interested in a guy to get free drinks. I can buy my own drinks, I don't need a man for that! However, a small part of me still feels like I am doing something wrong or there is something about me that makes me undesirable to the opposite sex. How unfair!
It looks like I am going to continue to be my strength and independence oozing self, drinks be damned!
When I tell people that I have never been bought a drink by a guy I get generally the same reaction. Usually some laughs (which makes me feel more pathetic) and then, "Are you serious? Why?". They tell me they don't believe it, that I have the looks and the personality so it doesn't make sense. I have had many friends tell me that they rarely buy drinks for themselves, they just flirt with guys and the drinks start flowing.
Is this really what is expected of my gender? Do I need strange men buying me drinks to be considered a real, sensual, desirable woman? I don't think so, I think it makes me more of a woman that I am not pretending to be interested in a guy to get free drinks. I can buy my own drinks, I don't need a man for that! However, a small part of me still feels like I am doing something wrong or there is something about me that makes me undesirable to the opposite sex. How unfair!
It looks like I am going to continue to be my strength and independence oozing self, drinks be damned!
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